the worst fuckin thing is
“oh you sing? are you a good singer? SING SOMETHING FOR ME RIGHT NOW”
“do you draw? you do? DRAW ME”
“you write? MAKE ME A CHARACTER IN YOUR STORY”
“you act? CRY FOR ME RIGHT NOW”
“You speak that language?! Say something in it!”
“you murder? KILL ME RIGHT NOW”
The last one seems more doable
"too vague" writes my English teacher on my essay
kind of like the instructions you gave us you piece of shit
YASSSSSS MY LIT TEACHER EXACTLY
i’m all for boys wearing makeup mostly because if more of them got into it there’d be a bigger market and it wouldn’t cost $25 for an eyeshadow primer anymore
i can’t wait to go into the makeup aisle to get the latest man-color of guyshadow that comes in containers shaped like bullets and footballs
"Bruh I just went to sephora and got the sickest shade of eyeshadow"
"Sick dude what’s it called"
"Monster truck gas fumes"
A muggle-born’s sibling sends them a howler in the middle of the school year and it arrives while they eat. When they open it, all it does is simply scream “WHAT TEAM?”. Nearly all the muggle-borns shout “WILDCATS!” before returning to their meal, leaving the pure-bloods in total confusion of what the hell they just witnessed.
I accept and fully support this headcanon
on average menstruation starts at age 12
and ends at 52
40 years of periods
480 periods x average length of 5 days
that’s 2400 days of bleeding
6.58 years of blood
That’s so metal.
think of all the people you could drown in nearly 7 years worth of blood
7 Years Of Blood sounds like a deathcore band rock on ladies
“boys will be bo-“
*punches you in the face*
bOYS WILL BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR ACTIONS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE
we will not.
you will do so or i’ll shove responsibility so far up your ass you’ll taste tax bills for weeks
"Family gatherings" aka "90% of the people here are racist"
"Family gatherings" aka "90% of the people here are homophobic"
"Batman Family gatherings" aka "90% of the people here are dead"
Was that really necessary?
i’ll be like 40 w/no kids and people will say “aw i’m so sorry for you” and i’ll be like how was the fucking wiggles reunion tour asshole i went to italy last week for fun and didn’t have to hire a sitter
This is a very sad mentality. To think oneself more important than that of progeny is the sign of a failed human life.
so the wiggles concert wasn’t as good as you thought it would be huh
are cafeterias a real thing like do those actually exist in america you just line up and get given gross food and then eat in the same room as your entire school??? if that happened at my school there’d be a riot imagine how loud that would be are cafeterias a myth…do you…do younot have cafeterias elsewhere?
WHERE DO YOU EAT
(it is very loud)